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Hello and welcome to episode number 53 of the Mom-entum podcast, the show dedicated to inspiring, uplifting and empowering women on their journey through motherhood.  I’m your host, Tanya Valentine, thank you so much for joining me today!

 

So I’m back with another weekly episode of this podcast, and if you listened a couple of weeks ago you might remember me reporting that I was going to scale back and begin putting new episodes out less frequently to allow for more time with my kids.  

 

While this is definitely still my plan, I thought to myself, you know I would really like to continue with the weekly episode frequency at least until the 1 year anniversary of this Podcast. That way I can say to myself that I put out brand new episodes and showed up every week consistently for an entire year.  

 

There’s something to be said about being consistent and doing what you say you are going to do.  When you do what you say you are going to do, it helps develop trust in yourself, so that you know when you say you are going to do something, especially if you take the time to write it down or schedule it on the calendar, you know it will get done.  

 

And then that trust breeds confidence.  And knowing that I stuck with this for an entire year, putting out new episodes every week.  I imagine that as a reward.  That year-long milestone is a reward for me.  It gives me that feeling of accomplishment, which I love.  

 

So last year, Wednesday October 4th was when the very first episode of this podcast aired.  So October 9 will be the last weekly episode, and after that I will be moving to airing new episodes biweekly.  So stay tuned for that and in the meantime you can enjoy listening to new content from me and some other inspiring Moms I have in the cue to share their knowledge and expertise! It’s gonna be great!

 

So today I’m going to be talking about the power of your mind and how it is really the single most important obstacle we must learn to overcome in order to achieve our personal best or make our dreams a reality, or simply get what we want in life.

 

So a couple of weeks ago we were driving to St. Joseph, MI to spend the weekend there.  

 

Which, by the way, if you have never been, and you live in the NWI area, I highly recommend taking your family there.  For us, it’s our favorite place to visit in the summer and it’s a quick drive, it only takes us about an hour and a half to get there.  And the beach there is nice and clean, they have a playground right on the beach for the kids, and a concession stand.  

 

Just off the beach they have a huge splash pad, which the kids love, plus its nice for rinsing off the sand.  And just behind the splash pad is a pizza place which is actually a sit down restaurant and they do serve food other than pizza.  But the pizza is what they are known for and it is our favorite.  

 

So you can be sitting at a table, looking out at the view of the beach and Lake Michigan and it is just beautiful.  

 

Oh and I didn’t even mention they have a carousel there, too, which is also a kid favorite.  And in the building where they have the carousel they also sell popcorn, they have a gift shop, and a model train that the kids love to watch.  And they have coloring pages, crayons, board games, cornhole set up outside and chalk available for anyone to use on the sidewalk.  It’s just a really fun place for families to go.

 

So anyways.  We are driving to St. Joe and as we are driving through my town I keep seeing these signs for this 5k coming up next week.  And then I remembered receiving an email from Lucia's school promoting this race to raise funds for the school district here.  So it peaked my interest.  

 

Now I love to run, but it’s been years since I’ve run in a race.  I definitely haven’t run a race since I’ve had kids but if I had to guess I would say the last race I ran was back in 2014 which now that I think about it, was 10 years ago.  But I thought a 5 k, I can do that.  I’m trained for that.  

 

I get up every morning at 5 am and I work out, I will either run outside, which now that has stopped because it’s still pitch black at 5 am here and I don’t like running in the dark.  But anyway I’ll either run outside, or on the treadmill or I’ll do a peloton work out.  And that’s literally every day, except 1 day a week I will rest but its an active rest where I will do 10 minutes abs and then 20 minutes of yin yoga.

 

So anyways, I had this thought, ok as long as Chris isn’t working and he’s cool with taking the kids in the morning, I’m signing up for this race.  So I checked in with him and he said he was fine with it, so ok I sign up.  

 

So as the week goes on I start thinking, what if I could win this race.  What if I could be the first woman to cross the finish line? That would be so cool!  And i really started to think maybe this was possible.  The way I train, i mean yes I havent run a race in years, but I should be in good enough shape to be able to do it.

 

And later on in the week, I’m listening to the School of Greatness podcast and it’s this interview with David Goggins.  And maybe I’ve been living under a rock, but I’ve heard the name David Goggins, however I never really knew who he was until this interview. And man, this interview was pivotal for me.  

 

Hearing his story, and the tremendous challenges he has overcome,  the obstacles he has just obliterated in his life.  And it’s all been because of his mindset.  The average person wants to distance themself from discomfort, we want to avoid it.  This guy, he charges towards the discomfort.  He looks for it, because he knows that it is the currency for getting what he wants and achieving what some would call impossible.  

 

So I’m listening to him in this interview, talking about how he literally ran on broken legs when he was in training for the Navy Seals.  Not that I’m saying anyone should do that, no, please don’t.  But it's just an example of what is possible when we learn to manage and harness the power of our minds.

 

So I’m listening to this interview and its just getting me amped up for my race.   Mind you, I’m only doing a 3 mile race and here he is talking about running 100 miles non stop in 24 hours.  But I’m like this is getting me hyped for this race and it’s making me want to go out there and like run through a wall.  

 

Listening to him speak, it energized me so much I was like ok, here’s the plan.  I am actually going to put on this podcast episode and listen to it as I am running this race to help give me the energy and stamina I’ll need to place in this race.

 

So I’m really now believing it is possible for me, and I tell my kids “Mommy’s gonna bring you guys home a medal!” So now I’m accountable.  I have to bring home a medal for them, they’re gonna be expecting it.

 

And now its the day of the race and im at the starting line, and I put that episode on, and the race begins and I’m listening to his story.  And the whole time I’m just thinking if this guy can run on broken legs.  People are out there running these ultra marathons, these 100 mile races.  I can push myself, I can go harder, its only 3 miles. The whole race, my mind was just so focused on the goal.  And as I’m running I’m realizing how this is actually possible and its happening because there hasn’t been a single woman that’s passed me.  So the thoughts in my mind were  this is possible, and you can do this, and your so much stronger, so much more capable than you can even imagine, lets see what I’m capable of.

 

So, low and behold, I did finish first overall female, so I was the first woman to cross the finish line. And that was my goal all along.  It wasn’t exactly easy and I definitely pushed myself and ran faster than I normally would have on my own.  And when I finished I could feel it in my chest and throat.  But that feeling of accomplishing what I set out to do…it was so worth the pain.  The best was coming home and how proud my kids were!  They each took turns wearing my medal, and I just thought wow, this is such a good feeling.  All because I believed it was possible.  All because I fed my mind with the fuel it needed to push past my limits.  And that fuel was hearing David Goggins speak. 

 

 I talk about how our thoughts create our feelings, and our feelings fuel our actions which then results in our outcomes.  Well the words that we hear when other people speak transform into thoughts in our brain.  Now there is a caveat to this, it is all about how we interpret what we hear as well.  

 

But we must make conscious decisions of what we are feeding our brain, what we are listening to.  I chose to listen to David Goggins, and his story, his message translated to thoughts in my mind like: anythings possible, you can do anything you set your mind to, and I’m capable of so much more, I have so much more left in the tank.

 

 And, if youre listening to this with kids pause this and put your air pods on for a second.

 

 So another thing that fires me up is, ok your either going to laugh or be offended by this and I hope your not offended.  But one thing that fires me up, is swearing. And one thing about David Goggins is, he cusses, A LOT.  And personally, I love it, I’m not offended by it at all and like I said, it gets me fired up.  I don’t know, there’s something about a good f bomb that makes me want to get after it, does anyone else agree?

 

Ok, so confession time.  Since the race and since listening to that podcast episode, I have been obsessed with David Goggins.  I even bought his audiobook, Can’t Hurt Me, which is about his life and I’m currently in the middle of reading it.  It is so good.  And in between chapters he even offers challenges for the reader to complete so that you can apply what you are learning and integrate it. With the ultimate goal of challenging yourself and blowing past your limitations.  

 

I feel like the message behind this book is that the only true limitations we have are the ones we create in our minds.  

 

He reminds us that we are leaving so much on the table.  He is THE example of what is possible.  He came from nothing.  His father was physically abusive to him, his brother and mom.  He and his mom left his father when he was still a young child, they moved out of state and had to start from nothing, living on welfare.  His mom often was not home because she was working 3 jobs to support them on her own.  He was afflicted with racism and other countless traumas. With a 3rd grade reading level in his junior year of high school, he taught himself how to read and write so he could pass the exam that would gain him entrance into the military.  He taught himself how to swim, which was essential to becoming a navy seal. 

 

 Its amazing what he’s been able to overcome and he says that at a certain point he realized no one was coming to save him.  He had to save himself.  

 

So look where he is today.  He is a retired navy seal, who went through hell week 3 times, and he is the only member of the U.S Armed Forces to complete SEAL training, Army Ranger School, and Air Force Tactical training. He’s run on broken legs, he has competed and placed in many ultra marathons, He has run 205 miles in 39 hours non stop. In 2013 he broke the world record for the most pull ups in 24 hours, completing 4,030 pull ups in 17 hours, completely splitting open the skin on his hands in the process.  He’s a motivational speaker and author, the guys got 12.5 million followers on instagram. I mean this guy is an animal and truly a living legend.

 

So what I’m learning from David Goggins and his book is that we can ultimately raise our standards and start making the changes we want to make in our life.  And it all comes down to mastering our minds, taking responsibility for our lives and not allowing the circumstances in our lives to become excuses.  He talks a lot about getting honest with ourselves and telling ourselves the truth.  Because that’s where the change begins, is by recognizing and acknowledging where there is room for improvement.  By identifying the things that we are using as excuses.

 

  He talks a lot about creating this calloused mind.  And he says to do this, just start doing the things that you really don’t want to do or that you have a hard time with.  Our brains naturally want to take the path of least resistance, it’s the way we have evolved as a species.  It’s that motivational triad; what motivates us is pleasure, avoiding pain, and conserving energy.  And this is because this is how we once stayed alive in the caveman days.  But now this way of thinking does not serve us, it actually hurts us.  

 

David Goggins says to take the path of MOST resistance and you will callous your mind. And what he means by callous is just hardening your mind so that you are able to tolerate more of the hard stuff.  He said he thought of this idea after seeing how calloused his hands got from doing hundreds of thousands of pull ups.  The callous that forms, its hardened skin that serves almost as a shield, protecting and allowing you to tolerate and withstand more.

 

It’s like the more you do the hard stuff, the things that you don’t want to do, the more you are going to be able to tolerate.  You are building tolerance for the discomfort.  And the discomfort is necessary to getting what you want. You want to lose weight, you will have to go through the discomfort of exercise and restricting your diet to get there.  You want a baby, you are going to have to go through the discomfort of pregnancy and pain of labor to enjoy this beautiful baby.  You want a partner, you are going to have to go through the awkwardness of dating.  You want to get to the top of the mountain?  You will have to climb it.  

And lets face it, we are all in this school of life.  And discomfort is inevitable, it just is.  So strengthening this muscle, building our tolerance for discomfort, its preparing us for the inevitable suffering and pain of life so that when shit happens, we are prepped and ready to go, we are that much more resilient.  Things happen and we might fall, but we bounce right back up again.  I feel like that is more the message that I am taking away from David Goggins.  I feel like he is the coach helping to prepare us for the fight of our lives.

 

So anyway I am absolutely loving this book and I have to say I am now such a fan of David Goggins.  I am  obsessed with getting inside his head and learning how someone like this, someone who has achieved the impossible, thinks. 

 

Now, let’s wrap up today’s episode with a reflection on the immense power of the mind. If there's one thing David Goggins teaches us, it’s that we are capable of so much more than we give ourselves credit for. The limits we perceive are often self-imposed, shaped by fear, discomfort, or old beliefs. But as we begin to challenge these limits, one small step at a time, we callous our minds—just like Goggins has done. We learn to push past what we thought was possible, unlocking a whole new level of resilience and strength.

 

Remember, discomfort is a natural part of life. It’s not something to avoid but something to lean into because that’s where growth happens. Whether it’s running a race, pursuing a goal, or just facing daily challenges, the hard stuff builds character, and it’s what sets us apart. As Goggins says, “Be uncommon amongst the uncommon.”He says the way to find peace is by going to war with yourself, not by sitting on the couch watching tv.

 

So, as you go about your week, think about the areas in your life where you might be holding back. What are the limits you’ve set for yourself? Are they really true? Can you challenge yourself to push past them, just a little bit? I promise, you’ll be surprised at how strong and capable you really are.

 

Thank you so much for joining me on today’s episode. If you enjoyed it, I’d love for you to leave a review or share it with a friend. And don’t forget to tag me on social media with your takeaways—I'd love to hear what resonated with you.

 

Alright, mamas, have a wonderful week! Keep showing up for yourself and pushing those limits.